the 8 deal breakers


It seems I can’t escape the topic of relationships and marriage these days. It’s been an increasingly popular subject more so since I have been pregnant. Most of the time the conversation has nothing to do with me and my personal relationship but yet about the one who brought up the conversation in the first place. No matter how the topic was broached it always seems to end with the inevitable… So what about you, Camille? Do I hear wedding bells in the near future?

Before I go any further I must mention that I’ve always been the girl who openly and proudly has had a soft spot in my heart for true love and having babies of my own. I won’t call myself a hopeless romantic because that just sounds cheesy but to make things easy I guess that’s what you can call me. Oh, plus I just don’t like the term “hopeless” because it sounds too much like helpless. I much rather be a hopeful romantic!

Anyway, with all this talk about marriage and relationships it had me questioning things like:

  • my past relationships
  • how do I show love
  • how do I accept love
  • do I truly love myself
  • do I know how to love another
  • …and so on

So while I won’t get into the nitty gritty details of all of those factors in this post–I will however share what I’ve come to find out are my core deliverables that need to be met in order for my union to be promising. Essentially, these are my 8 deal breakers (cue dramatic music)! Obviously, there are other qualities I may desire but I’d be willing to compromise on if these 8 factors are being met. So here goes! Please note:these are in no particular order of importance

  1. Physical Attraction
    Simply, am I physically attracted to him?
  2. Soul Connection
    Do we both share an indescribable spiritual connection? Not to be confused with a religious connection. Rather do we resonate energetically? Do we have such a strong soul connection that we can sense when the other is in danger when they are nowhere near us? Do we both pick up on signs or sense what the other needs without having to always verbalize it?
  3. Acceptance and Understanding
    No matter our differences is this someone who can on a soul-level still accept and understand me? He doesn’t need to agree with me but does he understand me. Is he able to accept the core building blocks of what makes me the person I am?
  4. Attentive 
    Does he really notice me? Does he know the real me or attempt to peel the layers back to discover the real me?  Can I confide in him and know without a doubt he is giving me his undivided attention? Remember: attentive, not to be confused with smothering or obsessive
  5. Protective
    Does he protect me emotionally and physically? Does he assist me with heavy items or dangerous tasks? Is he aware of our surroundings and on the lookout for alarming situations? Does he provide comfort to me in a situation that was emotionally straining for me? Finally, is he protecting himself and staying out of trouble? …because if he’s living a reckless risky lifestyle then he might as well be putting me in danger too.
  6. Loving
    Does he show me love in a multitude of ways? Whether it be professing his love publicly. Or if he shows love through acts of service such as rotating my car tires or fixing a loose floorboard (again, protective!). Does he surprise me with a little sweet gift I had briefly mentioned (attentive)? Overall does his actions make me feel loved? 
  7. Honest and Trustworthy
    Will he be open and honest with pertinent information even if it’s uncomfortable or hurtful? Is he overall quite honest in his interactions with others? From personal experience, if we have a soul-connection then we ought to have trust & honesty in the relationship because if not then I will sense that something energetically does not feel right. So better to be honest and forthcoming so we can work as a partnership to overcome situations together. 
  8. Grounded
    Is he pretty well-balanced and stable in his everyday life? Does he have a good work-play balance? Does he maintain balance between reality and spirituality? Is he financially responsible? Is he mentally stable? Is he sensible?

So there you have it! My deal breakers! In my opinion they really all go hand and hand together. What are your thoughts? Do you have a different set of deal breakers that you’d like to share? If you haven’t already, I highly recommend sitting down and writing the qualities that you cannot negotiate on whether it applies to platonic friendships or romantic relationships. Then as a fun little experiment, go down your list one by one and ask yourself whether a past or current romantic partner has met or is meeting your requirements. You can do this for plantonic friendships too. Give it a try you might find the results to be very eye-opening.

page of swords.


Sometimes I look up towards the ceiling and ask why…
Why am I here? Why would you leave us here? What purpose are we here for? Why…why…why? I just really have to ponder and ruminate on why we’re here. Why allow us to live in a world of suffer? Why do people feel a void, an emptiness? Why do we continue to live in a grayscale world where you work for money to survive? Where is the joy? Where is the fulfillment, the passion, the child-like curiosity for the world? Why is it we feel so stuck in our reality? When do we get to escape the restless thoughts and demands of everyday life? Why do we not know how to breathe?

What is this…this life/movie/story/dream? Is it real? Why do I feel there is more than what meets the eye? These questions are not new to me but with my first born child on the way I can’t help but to revisit these unanswered questions. For what purpose am I to my daughter when I don’t know the purpose of why as a collective we are here. What am I to teach my daughter? One thing I know is I want her to know her purpose. I want her to feel fulfilled, happy, and joyous. I want her to live in a life of color. I want her sufferings to be the lessons in life to propel her to success in whatever manifestation she desires— whether it be in the form of money, love, true freedom, etc.

Perhaps my daughter is actually the one birthing me. Perhaps she has a plan and a mission for me. As I see it now, the only thing that is evident is the fact that my daughter is birthing life, happiness, joy, fulfillment into me. And I thank her for that.

soy, corn, sugar beets! oh my! GMO vs YOU

If you’re at the very least slightly tuned into the world then you’re probably well aware of the rise in GMOs, or genetically modified organisms. If you’re not familiar then here’s a brief explanation of what GMOs are:

The Institute for Responsible Technology defines it as “A GMO (genetically modified organism) is the result of a laboratory process where genes from the DNA of one species are extracted and artificially forced into the genes of an unrelated plant or animal. The foreign genes may come from bacteria, viruses, insects, animals or even humans.”

credit: Non-GMO Project explains it as “a GMO, or genetically modified organism, is a plant, animal, microorganism or other organism whose genetic makeup has been modified using recombinant DNA methods (also called gene splicing), gene modification or transgenic technology. This relatively new science creates unstable combinations of plant, animal, bacterial and viral genes that do not occur in nature or through traditional crossbreeding methods.”

In layman’s terms, scientist are the new farmers. They can literally crossbreed the genes of coldwater fish with tomatoes so that the tomato now can withstand freezing cold temperatures thus allowing more crops to be grown. Doesn’t sound so bad right? More food equates to more people fed…. Technically, yes. But what happens if the fish they are using are farm-raised fish? Farm-raised fish are generally kept in a small overcrowded pens and because they are marinating in such tight corners there is no real filtering of the water going on. So then these fishes become susceptible to diseases and corporate food companies can’t have that so the best thing to combat disease is to add in antibiotics to these fish farms. Need I say more? I think you know where that spirals into. Credits: Dr Axe

To be fair, let’s say these “GMO scientists” are not using fish genes. A different approach to producing more crops is to have herbicide-tolerant plants. No animal gene mixing involved there! The plant is engineered to withstand high levels of pesticides. Using pesticides on our produce is not a new concept for consumers but what is alarming is corporate food companies have been lobbying to raise the allowable limit of these chemical pesticides. So what! What’s the big deal? For one, these are linked to the same pesticides that are drastically killing our honey bees aka nature’s pollinators. Secondly, the crops that are being genetically altered to tolerate these chemicals have less nutritional values than organic crops do. This does more harm to us than not since American physicians have reported a majority of their patients having nutrient deficiencies thus leaving us susceptible to illnesses and abnormalities. In defense, these GM corporations have tried to modify the crops to have more nutritional benefits in them, but the only downfall to that is the human body does not absorb these nutrients in the same manner it would from a natural source. Lastly, the seeds of these genetically engineered crops are able to spread to other areas by way of the wind and have the potential to infect nearby organic farms.

Consumers who support genetically engineered foods for the reason that it can feed the entire world have the right to believe that. Personally, I haven’t seen such a thing happen. Even in terms of Americans having enough to eat, let alone the whole world. Quite frankly, I wouldn’t wish those less fortunate to have a choice between eating nothing and eating frankenstein food. It’s not fair. And it’s not fair that I have to be concerned about GM seeds infecting crops of organic farms. So next time you order popcorn and a Pepsi at the movie theatre just know what it is that you’re really ingesting.

More Information about GMOs:

Seeds of Death: Unveiling The Lies of GMO’s
Living Non-GMO Resources


Toxicology Expert Speaks Out About Roundup and GMOs
Labels on Genetically Engineered Food Coming Soon



surrender to vulnerability

For the last couple of months I have been feeling a little indifferent, not sure of why or what was causing me to feel this way. So I started to obsessively rack my brain trying to figure out how I can get back to feeling  “normal” again. In the midst of this reflective period, I went through spells of feeling withdrawn from the world, lazy, indecisive—the list goes on. Literally.

I tried to just ignore what it was I was feeling and tried my hardest to keep on trucking along. Finally, I came to a point where this was really starting to affect me physically and psychologically so I decided to surrender. I gave up resistance and submitted to the fact that I needed to take some immediate action. Admittedly, I cannot say I have conquered all of these issues I face. More than anything, writing and acknowledging these obstacles is healing for me and was the first step I decided to take. I hope that at the very least this post resonates with someone else who may be dealing or had previously dealt with the same situation. If you have some suggestions on how to combat these obstacles please leave a comment or send an email.

  • lethargy, laziness, lack of motivation
  • giving up when the going gets tough
  • suppressing my issues
  • disillusion
  • escapism
  • dependency
  • indecisiveness
  • lack of confidence
  • fear of failure
  • discontent
  • lack of willpower
  1. My lethargy/laziness stems from not feeling motivated, passionate, nor recognizing the importance of that action that requires my input. Feeling as though my rest and relaxation is more valuable than said action.
  2. Giving up when the going gets tough stems from laziness as I described above. Also, feeling as though continuing the path is not worthy or valuable; not seeing instant gratification. Impatience.
  3. Not acknowledging or rather suppressing my issues stems from thinking if something is out of sight then it’s also out of mind. Alternatively, from feeling that even if I were to address my issues, they would still go unresolved and thus making the process a waste of time (not worthy/valuable of my time).
  4. Disillusion comes from not having a sound and solid foundation of who I am. Getting sucked into different ideals that satisfy me temporarily until I’m on to my next conquest.
  5. Escapism comes from fear of facing my issue. I know what the issue is but I rather pretend it’s not there because quite frankly I don’t know how to resolve it, so why bother.
  6. Dependencies on people, environments, and substances stems from my need to escape a situation so the dependency acts a temporary distraction.
  7. Indecisiveness from self-doubt, uncertainty, or the feeling that I might make the wrong decision leading to let down or disappointment. The desire for wanting to be right and avoid failing, delays, or criticism.
  8. Lack of confidence due to feeling I won’t get my way in the situation, self-doubt, or the outcome will not be in my favor. Alternatively, not being able to accept rejection without feeling unworthy.
  9. My fear of failure stems from receiving criticism, pity, or disappointment from others. These things affect me because I’m dependent on how others see me since I don’t have a strong foundation for myself. Feeling ashamed of myself for not being better than I already am.
  10. I feel discontent with the way things are because I believe I should be doing better than the status quo. Feeling I am not good enough yet. Criticizing myself at where I am now instead of applauding myself from where I started at. Comparing myself to others and the mass majority standard of what’s acceptable.
  11. Lack of willpower due to feeling that I am not going to follow through to completion. Feeling as though I am too weak to persist, so why start in the first place. Doubting myself and my inner power. Feeling I’m not as strong as others to keep up.

confused, stuck, afraid of change?

I’m dedicating this to anyone who might feel somewhat stuck or confused about the direction their life is going. I recorded this voice memo on 2/11/2016 but the people I have met this week compelled me to want to share this now. If you’re feeling like your job is not the right fit for you or perhaps you’re in a relationship that is no longer conducive to your growth, this audio clip is for you. It may even be that you have a great job and a healthy relationship but maybe you’re feeling like there’s something more you’re suppose to be doing. In this audio clip, I am sharing my own personal experience of how I learned to:

  • follow my heart
  • know that I am not alone in my journey
  • clear my space and be open to receive
  • accept that mistakes/failures are my teachers rather than my enemy

This is a very raw recording, I didn’t feel the need to sugar coat the process of growing because growth can sometimes come with new challenges. So I’m dishing it out to you, all the good, bad, and ugly! I hope my experiences resonates with you or perhaps it may benefit someone you know who might be going through something similar. If this message does resonate with you be sure to write in or leave a comment, that will prompt me to post part two of this audio!

Much love and prosperity to you all


“There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way, and not starting.”

what inspires you?

Love inspires me. I love to love. I love giving love to others—friend, family, or foe. I have enough love to love everyone abundantly. I have a love for myself: mind, body, and spirit. I have a true wealth of love for my children who are yet to come and for the one who left too soon.

Giving back to others inspires me. I like helping others to see how important they are. I like giving motivational advice and guidance to people. People have always sought me out for this because I am unbiased and not afraid to be honest.

My spiritual calling inspires me. It wasn’t until my darkest moment that I woke up and realized that this did not have to be my reality. From that point, with guidance from the divine, I have been left tiny breadcrumbs to help me see the road to my success. And it’s just that; my success is not defined the same way as yours. My success lies in helping others and love people unconditionally. I find true worth in that. And it’s a plus because I will likely have one bangin’ obituary! (: Otherwise, I see nothing wrong in love people so they can pass it on and share the wealth. And I know my husband and children will adore me for these traits as well.

Please share below, what inspires you?

from my voice to your ears: love, spirituality, travel & career

Sometimes I find that thoughts, rants, and ideas in my head pop up so rapidly that it’s hard for me to write it all down. Especially during the nighttime, when ideas are running rampant and I’m just trying my hardest to get some shuteye! Who knows, as I’m writing this right now it almost sounds as if I have voices in my head, right? Wrong, many people experience the same thing I go through and thankfully that’s why they invented the voice recorder! For people like me who have amazing thoughts or questions but seem to forget what they are as soon as we go to reach for a pen and paper.

One of the voice recordings I want to share with you is all about love, travel, career, and spirituality. I go on to explain how these four areas in my life are taking shape into my 2016 year and previously my 2015 year. With 2015 having been my focus on all things related to “travel and spirituality” and now in 2016 my focus adds in all things related to “career and love”. These distinct focuses have more in common than that meets the eye. Have a listen then be sure to leave a comment down below. I am very curious to know whether you too are focusing on similar things or if you have a different method that is working for you!

home sweet home, or not

imageIf you’re anything like my family then you should find that the holiday season can bring joy, bonding, laughter, and the inevitable arguments! It’s true, something about everyone flying home for the holidays and being cooped up in the same house with relatives brings up unwanted tension. Though, this may sound tedious it can also be rewarding for your growth.

It is not too common that people will have friendships with people who share opposite views, opposite activities, and opposite tempers. In some retrospec, people naturally will befriend those who share similar views. Not to say that people only want clones of themselves in their inner circle but for the most part people want friendships with people they will not collide heads with. It is this same reasoning why you might be prone to have disagreements with your relatives when you’re shacking up with them for the holidays. This is especially true for siblings.

Fortunately, your families can be great teachers for you. Most families are made up of different personalities; some more dominant than others. Either way, your family can teach you patience, compassion, empathy, and effective communicate. This is an excellent benefit to you especially if you live in the real world where you will run into people who do not think the same way as you. I’ve come up a 5-step guideline to make amends if you are in a heated argument with a relative.

  1. Be patient
  2. Listen to them
  3. Try understanding them
  4. Empathize
  5. Apologize

Let’s say you’re faced with a difficult and stubborn sibling. It helps you to elevate mentally by taking a step back, be patient and listen to their opinion or the problem at bay. This can be hard for some people because they are so eager to speak that they miss what the other person is telling them and inevitably this will lead to misunderstanding and no real resolution. However if you can be patient then you will be able to clearly listen to their issue and they will be more open to give you that same respect when it is your turn to speak. Once you have practiced being patient and listening you will find it easier to understand your sibling. Nevertheless, their guard and defense will also dissolve thus allowing you to relax too. Once you’re back in a calm open-minded mental state you can implement empathy to help alleviate any remaining discomfort the other might have.

Lastly, apologize. Apologize? Yes, apologize! I can imagine this will be tough for some to grasp but just hear me out. For example, say your sibling and yourself had an exchange of words that were hurtful to one another. Once you’ve gotten through steps 1-4, you two should already be on the verge of completely making amends so realistically it won’t be that hard to finish with an I’m sorry and hug it out. But I like to break things down for an easier digestion so allow me to explain why an apology is critical. An apology can serve as a benefit both for yourself and in this scenario, your sibling. Even if your sibling was definitely in the wrong it is still important to apologize to them. Your apology is not a sign of weakness it is actually a strength. Even if your sibling just cannot muster up the words of “I’m sorry” to you it is okay because you’ve already received your apology– the apology from yourself to yourself.

As I mentioned, an apology serves the both of you. If you apologize to your sibling, and they are immature they may think that they have won the battle. But this is far from true. When you apologize to them you are the real one gaining peace of mind and showcasing your strength. You gain peace because you’ve actually just manipulated the discussion to your favor. You’ve shifted the energy into one that is more light-hearted. You are the one in control just like a maestro is in control of the direction of his orchestra. Unbeknownst to your sibling they are too consumed in their ego to see what is happening below the surface. To be honest, your apology is most beneficial to you more so than the sibling. When you say “hey, I’m really sorry for yelling at you and calling you out of your name” that is in essence an apology to yourself. Because deep down you know that you are kind, peaceful, and loving so when you act out by yelling, cursing, slamming doors it is our of your character and you need to apologize to your mind, body, and soul for breathing in that negative toxic energy.

To delve deeper, think of a time you were really upset with someone. Did you yell? Were you stressed out? Did you punch the wall? Did you seek out revenge? All of these things are poisonous to yourself and you’re really causing dis-ease to your body. Not to be confused with disease, but rather a body not in ease. What happens when you yell? You get stressed and irritable. This stress can most definitely cause dis-ease to your physical body. You might get a headache, lose your voice from yelling, or even discover some new gray hairs. When you are angry and you punch a wall you can cause harm to your hand. Or if you drive off in a rage you could get into a car accident. I mean seriously, even strokes can be triggered by intense stress! So do yourself some justice and apologize for your actions. That apology is owed to your body from the stress that you caused it and that apology will summon the other person to drop their anger towards you. Thus allowing you two to be in harmony again and more importantly allowing you to regain your peace again. If you skip out on apologizing then you are susceptible to having unfinished business which will likely cause underlying tension between the two of you. Which will likely cause you more stress and make you vulnerable to the same argument resurfacing. So this is why I highly recommend finishing with a genuine apology.

As for your sibling or the person you were arguing with, they may never apologize to you but that’s okay because you are not dependent on their apology or lack thereof. Ironically, your sibling is the one who gets the short end of the stick because they will always be dependent on someone else’s apology and if one is not given to them they will tend to harbour resentment, anger, hatred, and other deep-seated issues which will create disharmonious ease to their physical body. They will find themselves always in confrontation, stressed out, and more prone to exhaustion. Furthermore, the negative energies will bog them down so much that other people may find their aura to be unsettling. It is unfortunate but that kind of person will always be in defense mode and will lead a pessimistic life if they do not change for the better. So again I say to make amends the best way you can with others in order to gain your self-peace and happiness. Be thankful of those who are different than you as they will be your learning curve to creating the peaceful life you desire.

the catch twentytwo

wolfinsheepsclothesWith a large group of youths flocking to social media it is no wonder why many of our youth are fixated on being just like the public figures they see on their timeline. Whether it’s Kim K, Miley Cyrus or even self-made celebrities like The Westbrooks, young adults see it all. It’s just TV, no harm right? Maybe so but when your child is not being exposed to healthy and positive public figures they fall susceptible to the ideals of others. Afterall, children of all ages are very impressionable and mimic what they see. You can read the quote I posted about how the subconscious mind works by clicking here to understand how this can affect anyone’s mind, young or old.

Today we are told if you’re an intellect, nonconformist, or into the occult then you’re labeled an “outsider”, “different” or the occasional “weirdo” works just fine. Now, that does not mean those labels have to be anything particularly negative depending on how you perceive it. However it is the “popular”, “normal”, mainstream people we idolize that are the ones with scandals, greed, anger, and no sense of unity. Why is it that these kinds of characters remain as the top dog? Or better yet, why is it so hard for those with a positive message to obtain the same level of fame in the same (or less) amount of time? Why is the majority of society attracted to the negative? Is it accurate to say that negativity attracts more negativity? Or are people attracted to contrast; do positive people just like hearing about negative news? I’d like to think not. It seems as though it’s just easier for people to conform and passively be subjected to disharmonious traits. It takes effort to be united, positive, helpful, kind and be consciously aware. It may sound a bit cheesy but question yourself on whether you’re a sheep or a wolf. Really give it some thought.

We live in a divided world in many aspects. Those who are wealthy live sheltered lives because too many people will try to use them for their own benefit. Those who are poor go unnoticed or their voices go unheard. Or what about those who have thousands of followers on Twitter but still feel extremely lonely everyday because they have no true close friends to call their own. And don’t forget about the woman who is labeled a “gold digger” because she married a man solely for his money. She thought she had won the jackpot up until the agony of heartache and loneliness embraced her every night.

Why do we do this to ourselves?

Yet we have been told by many influential people and spiritualist about our dire need to change for the better good…and we are changing. We are getting better in some ways and becoming stagnant in other ways. Luckily, for us esoteric lovers of astrology we understand that those who were born during the baby boomer years and especially the years following were born to question the system, seek truth, and rebel (hence the hippie phase)! This is when many activist, artists, and revolutionary leaders were popping up left and right. We can hope that these same people are still spreading their knowledge to our youth, if all else fails let’s hope the cosmos still have our backs!